The cRAcK Files
by Shitai-Shitai
Summary: These stories include the most cracky shippings, settings, and plot. Will probably contain every vocaloid eventually. Note: I tried to write very badly so that it would seem more cracky. THERE IS NO SMUT!


**I do not own vocaloid...**

**Yes, this was written badly on purpose.**

**ENJOY!**

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IA was silently brushing her teeth when she heard a noise in the greenhouse. She rushed into the greenhouse to see what was causing a fiasco. Meito ran in with a butcher knife and started chopping up the walls. IA covered her face because of the falling glass.

"Meito you BAKA! STOP MAKING MY OCHINCHIN GO DOKI DOKI!" IA said as she slapped him silly.

"Onii-chan!" screamed Meito, "I can't help it if your ochinchin gets tingly."

IA blushed and ran away into the mansion. Meito closely followed her. She tripped over a stone and fell onto the moist grass. He fell on top of her. She blushed furiously. IA found herself in a sexual situation.

"NO!" she screamed as she pushed him off of her, "I will not become some loli of yours."

IA ran into her bedroom and slammed the door shut.

"Aw man," said Meito, "Not dead babies again!"

Meito walked down the stairs and tripped over the dead axe murderer. _We should really clean up the place! _He thought, _That axe murderer has been dead for 3 months!_

IA was reading the newspaper in her room. _Oh look! The rubber chicken factory is for sale! Let's move in there! _she thought. She skipped happily to tell Mother Miku the good news.

Mother Miku was surprised to see IA getting overwhelmed by an abandoned rubber chicken factory. Even though Mother Miku liked the mansion, she decided to move with the rest of the vocaloids to the rubber chicken factory. It smelled like rubber because it was a rubber chicken factory. Rin barfed when she entered the old factory because she is allergic to rubber. Rin cried because she wanted to live in the factory but was forced to live in the old outhouse.

Rin was crying buckets because she had to live in a stinky outhouse and she was also allergic to the cement so she could not sleep on the cement which surrounded the outhouse. While every other vocaloid was telling secrets in the rubber chicken factory, she had to smell the secret of the outhouse. Suddenly, Rin heard a knock on the outhouse door. Rin opened the door to see Kiyoteru facing her. She started swelling up because the cement scent was approaching her. She fainted in Kiyoteru's arms.

Kiyoteru took her to the rubber chicken factory so the personal doctor can take a look at Rin. It turned out she actually had a fatal disease and was suppose to die in exactly 214 minutes. Kiyoteru saved her by kissing her on the lips. By being kissed by her true love, she lost all of her allergies. She woke up and Kiyoteru took her to the shed for who knows what.

While Kiyoteru and Rin were doing their thing, IA was sobbing in the closet. Meito kept on falling on her and it was too much for her to handle. She thought she was safe in the closet but she was wrong. Little did she know, Yuki was standing behind her enjoying IA's wails. Just as Yuki was about to swing her axe at IA, the door opened. Yuki hissed and crept back into the dark.

"What are you doing here?" asked Meito.

"I'M HIDING FROM YOU! YOU BAKA!" screamed IA.

Meito was astonished to hear IA's voice ringing in his ears. He quickly stepped aside and IA ran towards her bedroom. IA bolted the door and jumped onto her bed.

"WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE ME SO MUCH?" yelled IA to her pillow, "I just want to fit in!"

IA tried to hold it in, but her tears started streaming out of her eyes. She cried for some time and then there was a knock on her door.

"Come in!" IA said as she wiped her tears.

The door opened to reveal Yuki.

"Oh hey there, Yuki!" said IA.

Yuki did not respond but she started walking towards IA with a huge smile on her face.

"Ummm…. Yuki?" said IA.

Yuki was about to cut IA open with the knife she was hiding behind her back but she never got the chance to because Mother Miku flew in. IA stood up.

"What is it Mother Miku" she asked.

"There's trouble with Rin!" replied Mother Miku.

IA and Mother Miku ran out of the bedroom and Yuki hid in IA's closet. IA rushed to find out what was a matter with Rin. It turned out, Rin tripped and she is allergic to tripping. Fortunately, Kiyoteru saved her again with his flamboyant kisses.

The vocaloids were at peace for some time until Len tripped over a rock and everyone found out that Rin was allergic to people tripping. Rin was in quarantine for a long time until Kiyoteru returned from his business trip in Russia and he saved her again with his kiss.

IA never did finish brushing her teeth.


End file.
